Our kids will have “sex & body” conversations with us or without us. These conversations are too important to pass off to someone else! Here’s a list of books to help you talk to young kids about sex and body safety.
This article is geared toward kids who are ages 3-7 but you may be able to use these resources with kids who are younger or a little bit older. I share in this article HERE how to have a conversation with your preschooler about their sexuality.
My hope is to encourage moms and dad to take the opportunity to establish themselves as the primary source of information about sex.
Let’s take the challenge today and open up healthy and age appropriate conversations with our kids about sex and body safety.
Sex is Not a Bad Word
Sex is something beautiful, amazing, physical, emotional and spiritual! I want my kids to know this and I want them to hear this from us! I want them to know they can come to talk to us about anything, ANYTHING including sex.
I love using children’s books to help me get a point across to my boys about a particular subject.
The following are books I used to have various conversations with my preschooler-tween. I also share some books that I didn’t use but after reading the reviews I felt comfortable enough to recommend them.
I try not to make our sexuality conversations an event (other than the 8-9yr old talk) the rest of the conversations just happen as we do life together: out walking, at bedtime, in the car, when we sit down and read.
I have used these books as resources but also as read aloud books to all three of my boys. If it’s a book that I want one-on-one time with them to get more feedback then I go back and read it to them individually.
I highly recommend you sit down and read these books with your child and not just hand them a book and say, “Let me know if you have any questions.” I know the latter may be easier than going through feeling uncomfortable take my word for it, “It’s totally worth it!” Our kids are older a bit older now and we have reaped the rewards of having these uncomfortable conversations with them.
Books To Help You Talk to Young Kids About Sex
Note there are lots of books out there that you can use to help your child learn about their sexuality but these are the ones that I feel comfortable using with my children.
Some books may have too much information for you, others may not have enough.
What I do when the book has too much information:
- I use it as a teaching tool and only share the section of the book to get my point across.
- Other times I just summarize a page or two if it’s not what I want them to hear at the time but I continue reading the whole book.
When it has too little information or not enough of our values or beliefs then I just sprinkle in our values and beliefs into the story as I read to them. (affiliate links)
I start off by talking to my kids about how awesome their body is and how God created us with amazing bodies. One book that I love that works for kids of all ages is — The Busy Body Book. The book says it’s “A Kid’s Guide to Fitness” but don’t let that keep you from buying it because it’s so much more then that. It does not discuss sex but it opens up the conversation to having every day conversations with our kids about our bodies. I read it to my son when he was 4 years old and I thought it might be over his head but they had tons of great pictures and explanations that kept us all in awe of what our body can do. You can find it here.
Amazing You! by Dr. Gail Saltz –Teach them about privacy and what parts of their body are private is another must have conversation. It can also go in conjunction with the book below on how girls and boys bodies are different. Our children are naturally curious so they may want to see what some one else body looks like. It’s important that our kids know what parts of our bodies are private to protect them. You can find it HERE.
Who Has What? Robin H. Harris – Another great conversation to begin with is about how are bodies are different as girls and boys. This book is great for preschoolers who are becoming aware of their bodies and are curious. These kinds of books will also help you introduce the correct names for their genitals if you haven’t already done so, I highly recommend you do. You can find it HERE.
I said No! by Kimberly King – This is a great book that I love using with my kids. I highly recommend it! This is one of the books that I read to my boys together but then I read it with them individually because I wanted them to feel free to share any questions or comments they may have. This books helps kids better understand situations that might be confusing or dangerous. “Using a simple, direct, decidedly non-icky approach that doesn’t dumb down the issues involved, as well as an easy-to-use system to help kids rehearse and remember appropriate responses to help keep them safe, I Said No! covers a variety of topics, including: What s appropriate and with whom. How to deal with inappropriate behavior, bribes and threats. ” ~via Amazon You can find it HERE.
The Story of Me by Stan and Brenna Jones – Another conversation that you’ll want to have is–How Babies Are Made?” It’s up to you how in-depth you’ll want to go with this. You may just want to keep it simple and say, “Daddy planted a seed in Mommy and it grew in my tummy.” Or you may want to explore it a bit further but without the full fledge conversation of the mechanics. I shared this with my boys, “A man and a woman make a baby and it grows in the women’s uterus.” This book is faith based and has age appropriate terminology for kids between the ages of 3-5. You can find it HERE.
Before You Were Born by Jennifer Davis – I have not read this one but I like the reviews on it and how it goes through the development of a baby. This type of book is the kind of like the first book I used with my boys when they asked me where babies come from, when I was pregnant. They were amazed and loved it. The book I used with them, I can’t find so I’m sharing this one. ” Each page shows what’s happening to the mother on the outside and then, under the flap, in the mother’s belly to the baby on the inside. Children learn how Mommy is feeling and how the baby is developing, about hiccups, kicks, and umbilical cords, a first heartbeat, and the contractions that mark the beginning of labor.~ via Amazon
Some Secrets Should Never Be Kept by Jayneen Sanders– Another topic that is important to discuss with our kids when talking about our sexuality and that is safe touch and unsafe touch. This is not to only to prepare them from unwanted situations but to guide your child as they are learning themselves their own boundaries on what is appropriate and inappropriate. You can find it HERE!
My Body Belongs to Me by proFamilia – Another good book to help you discuss “My Body Belongs to Me! an educational tool to help instill confidence in children when it comes to their bodies. The narrative of the story is led by a girl named Clara, who encourages kids to say “no” if they are uncomfortable with physical contact.” via Amazon You can find it HERE.
I share HERE our “High-Five” plan, it’s a simple way to help your children establish boundaries when they are around adults or others they may know but they don’t want to be touched even if it’s in a safe way.
It’s Not the Stork! by Robie H. Harris – This book has more in depth information and if your child is not ready for all of it then you can choose summarize and skip over a page or two. You can find it HERE!
Good Pictures and Bad Pictures by Kristen A. Jenson – Another conversation that I highly recommend parents having with their young kids. This book would be one you would want to use with children 6 and up. But the information is amazing so I highly recommend you purchase it for yourself and then summarize some of the points to your children who are younger. Now that our toddlers are walking around with tablets and phones it’s important that we give our little ones the tools at a young age if they were to come across bad pictures. I share HERE more about how to have this conversation with your preschooler and HERE with your elementary-highschool age child. You can find it HERE.
30 Days of Sex Talks – Is a great resource for parents to help you dive in and have these talks with your kids. They even have questions to help prompt your conversations. ~via Amazon You can find it HERE.