Today we have a guest writer, Deb Ober, who is partnering with me as we journey together through the book Mom Set Free. Deb is sharing with us from her own experience on “How to Lay it Down and Trust God with Our Kids”. This is session 2 of our Summer Reading Book Club and all I can say is Jeannie Cunnion must’ve been reading my diary.
As Moms we feel the pressure of raising our kids “right”, whatever that means to each of us.
We feel judged when our kids throw a temper tantrum in the grocery store, or hit another child in preschool. But more than that, we feel like we are failing at our most important job.
When we look at raising our children with an eternal perspective, the stakes are much higher. We feel the pressure of trying to mold our children’s hearts into people who love God and love others. An overwhelming task, to say the least!
That’s why chapters 4-6 of Mom Set Free (Summer Book Club) are some of my favorites! We are reminded that we are not the ones who hold all the keys to our child’s heart. What a comfort and a relief to remember that God is in control and that He loves our children even more than we do!
- We feel the pressure to lead our children to salvation…of course we do! What else could be more important than insuring that our children spend eternity in Heaven? But Jesus tells us:
“For no one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws them to me, and at the last day I will raise them up.” John 6:44
So, I can lay that down, and trust God with the children He’s entrusted to me.
- We feel the pressure to produce in our kids lives a thriving faith. And of course, we can read the Bible with them, pray with them, take them to church etc. but as Paul reminds us:
“I planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God has been making it grow. So neither the one who plants nor the one who waters is anything, but only God, who makes things grow.” 1 Corinthians 3:6-7
So, I can lay that down, and trust God with the children He’s entrusted to me.
- We feel the pressure to produce godly character in our kids. But how do we do that when some days we aren’t even modeling godly character for our kids? Again we feel like we’re falling short, but Paul reminds us:
“For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him.”
So, I can lay that down, and trust God with the children He’s entrusted to me.
- We feel the pressure to secure a bright future for our children. But again the Bible reminds us:
“For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.”
So, I can lay that down, and trust God with the children He’s entrusted to me.
- We feel the pressure to give our children a happy life and protect them from hardships. But what a mistake that would be! When I look back on the most difficult seasons of my life, those were the times when my faith was strengthened the most. Paul reminds us:
“We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love.” Romans 5:3-5
So, I can lay that down, and trust God with the children He’s entrusted to me.
Now, if you’re like me you may be thinking, “ If we’re laying all of those important issues down and trusting God with them, what is left for me to do?”
In Chapter 5 Jeannie reminds us, “We do our best parenting through prayer!” Pray when things are going well, pray when your child is struggling, pray over their future, pray about all the things you are worrying about! One of my favorite passages is Philippians 4:6-7,
“Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.”
Instead of worrying, PRAY! I don’t know about you, but I need that reminder today. My youngest is 16 years old and trust me, there is plenty to worry about. But God is faithful and he reminds me to come to him with all my worries and trust him.
“Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you” 1 Peter 5:7
Isn’t that a great truth? He cares for you! He cares for me! And he cares for our children too! And he wants us to cast all our worries, fears and anxiety onto him so that he can carry them for us. He is the One who can handle them and he wants us to trust him. So let’s pray for our children about everything, every day. It truly is the most important part of parenting.
In addition to praying for them, raising our children in a Christ-centered home is crucial if we are to help them become adults who love and serve God with their whole hearts. We can saturate their lives with the Good News that God loves them enough to send his only Son to die for them so that they can be with Him forever! Not only that, but He gives us forgiveness for all of our sins, failures and weaknesses, and who doesn’t need to hear that every day?
As moms we have the awesome privilege and responsibility to lead our children into a life of faith, always with our eyes on the Author and Perfecter of that faith. I’m so grateful to have the opportunity to shepherd my children’s hearts, but I’m even more grateful that God is always working in their lives to do so much more than I ever could.
So can I just tell you something a little scary but at the same time completely freeing??
*You aren’t enough* In your own strength, you aren’t up to this overwhelming task. You can’t be the perfect mom. You will make mistakes, just like I have and just like every other mom has. Lots of them. But that’s how it’s supposed to be!
We aren’t perfect moms and we don’t have perfect kids, but we do have a perfect Savior, and he loves them even more than we do! He wants us to rely on Him…our weakness is made perfect in his strength! And you know what, as we learn to rely on Him, we’re teaching our children to do the same. And that may just be the most important thing they could ever learn from their mama.
It was so hard for me to come to the realization that no matter how hard I tried, and no matter how much I loved my children and wanted to be the best I could for them, that I was never going to be the perfect mom.
I made mistakes every day. Still do. But God uses even my mistakes to shape my children, HIS children, into who they were created to be.
You can get the Free printable above “He can be trusted.” by following along HERE!
See, it’s not all up to me and it’s not all up to you! Of course, we continually strive to take great care of our kids, to love them and pray for them and train them and create memories with them, and we all know that just meeting their needs is a full time job and then some.
But when we really understand that the outcome is ultimately in God’s hands, it FREES us to relax just a bit and enjoy motherhood a whole lot more.
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