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family parenting

Mothering with Confidence in God’s Love

Mothering with confidence in God’s love seems like something we should already know. But the reality is many of us know this in our heads but it hasn’t clicked in our heart. Keep reading!

I looked at my husband from across the table at one of our favorite eating spots. The well of tears came rolling down and I said,
 
I can’t give our boys grace if I don’t accept it for myself. It’s not that I want to win my salvation. I know I’m saved by grace alone. I can grasp the fact that only Jesus’ death on the cross brings me salvation. But it’s the day-to-day grace I can’t grasp. It’s day-to-day sanctification that I need to understand.
 
It’s the desire to make sure I’m earning my keep. When I haven’t earned my keep I feel like God is disappointed. The reality is I can NEVER earn my keep there’s always something to work on. But here’s the thing when God sees me He doesn’t see all my good works or failed attempts; He sees the saving work of Jesus.
 
All along I’ve had it all wrong! This earning His love thing has left me exhausted and critical of myself and others.  I DON’T want our kids to grow up believing this distorted theology.

Grasping God’s Love

Here’s the thing because I had not grasped how God’s love works I was not able to live out of His grace nor parent my own kids from that place. Our lack of grasping His love and grace leaves us unconsciously inflicting shame, guilt, and criticism on others.

I accepted His merciful gift of salvation but I couldn’t accept His gift of grace therefore struggled with grasping His love.

When I finally put my pride aside and stopped depending on my own goodness and accepted that I am not enough and nothing I do or don’t do changes my relationship with my Heavenly Father that’s when freedom began. I’m still baby stepping my way on this journey but I’ve tasted and seen His goodness and I refuse to back without a fight.

God helped me see that my sinfulness and shortcomings are designed to lead me to the cross, not to condemnation.

Repentance leads me to the feet of His grace and forgiveness. That forgiveness is what helped me walk in freedom. I was finally able to grasp that I didn’t have to earn His love I just had to live out of it.

We need to be certain of God’s love so that no matter what happens to us circumstantially, emotionally, or physically, the security of His Love is always there. So when our feelings tell us otherwise we can push the override button and go with what we know to be true–His word.

When I finally allowed the truth of His love and grace, not my own version of it to sink in I literally felt like I was 100 pounds lighter. How had I not seen this before? It was life-changing!

But this grace story is one that keeps unfolding as I mature in my faith journey. God has repeatedly taught me this lesson over and over again throughout my life. I remember the first time “God’s grace” clicked beyond head knowledge, I was in college. Then it was when I was a young mom and now it was as a mature Christian and a missionary but utterly covered in the mud of “doing” and earning.

This is why I am willing to share my weaknesses in order to help and encourage you out of this pit of mud. This is why we are reading Mom Set Free for our Summer Book club.

Repentance Doesn’t Mean Try Harder

“Repent doesn’t mean “try harder”. It means “run to Jesus”. (pg 148)

This is a great reminder as we do life in general but also as we mother our little ones.  Here’s the thing we have to continuously remind ourselves in the midst of perfect Pinterest photos and all the social media updates that go through our feed–there is NO perfect mom, we all fall short.

We WILL make mistakes and fail in this thing we called motherhood. And when we do we are assured that “he is faithful and just to forgive us”. (1 John 1:9) Unlike the popular author, Hollis who said this about motherhood, “You were made for this you will not fail.”

She obviously forgot that the first woman and mother utterly failed at the garden.

If you’re like me you may be tempted to wallow in your mistakes or hide in shame but don’t stay there. Our hearts and mind are desperate for the peace that comes from no longer carrying that burden around–freedom.

When we go to God and wholeheartedly ask for forgiveness we will ALWAYS find mercy and grace to help us in our time of need. Not only sometimes or when it’s not a big sin–always!

Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” Hebrews 4:16

Exchanging Striving and Shame for Rest

“You and I have been personally invited to exchange striving and shame for repentance and rest…Restlessness will rule the hearts of those in pursuit of self-perfection. But rest will enfold the hearts of those who anchor their identity in the perfection of Christ.” pg 150

Rest that sounds beautiful. We may not be in a season of rest with mothering because of our children’s ages and stages of life but the rest God offers us is soul rest.

When our minds or feelings are prone to wander we must take those thoughts captive and bring them up against God’s truth.
In repentance we find freedom, we find rest.
In taking out thoughts captive we find freedom, we find rest.
In His truth and not our actions we find rest.
When we cease striving, we find rest.

That’s how we baby step our way to living out of God’s love is by living in His grace. Remembering we do not need to earn His love. “God’s Love is nota gift that only some receive, but a gift that we ALL receive when we are saved. Therefore, if you have asked (Jesus into your heart) to be your Savior and Lord, then not only is Jesus in your heart, but His Love is there also.” ~ Nancy Missler

It’s how our homes are full of grace and truth.

So here is a printable you can download in my SHOP (with a white background) to remind you what God says in His word about His love for you so when your feelings or experience says something different you can hold on to Truth. But if you do not want to download the printable the verses written below. Enjoy filling your mind with what is true,

Knowing God Loves Me Verses

*Jeremiah 31:3 “I have loved you, my people with an everlasting love. With unfailing love I have drawn you to myself.”

Romans 5:8 “But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.”

*You were chosen before the foundation of the world to be God’s beloved, adopted, accepted, redeemed and forgiven child. Ephesians 1:3-8

*Isaiah 43: 1-5 “because you are precious to me.You are honored, and I love you…” You are loved. You are known. You are valued.”

*Zephaniah 3:17 “He will take delight in you with gladness. With his love, he will calm all your fears. He will rejoice over you…”

John 15:9 “As the father has loved me so he has loved you.”

1 John 3:1, John 15:13, Psalm 17:8, Romans 8: 16-17, Ephesians 2: 8-11, Isaiah 43: 2-4

If you need help realigning your motherhood I’d love to help you through a life coaching session. I am a certified life coach and I help women go from overwhelmed to purposeful. If you’re feeling like you’re being pulled in every direction and you have no time for yourself, God, or what is most important to you. I’d love to help you realign your time to what matters most to you. You can get more information HERE or fill out this form HERE and I’ll get back to you shortly.

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