Contributing Writer: Leslie Foster from Ponderings of an Ohio Farm Girl
Are you faced with having to make a decision or change in your life?
If so, here’s a question for you: Are you lying to yourself? You might be doing it unintentionally. Society teaches us lies all the time, and without even realizing it, we absorb those lies as part of our belief systems. Below are four of the lies that we’ve been taught about making changes in our lives.
You probably won’t find anything to astoundng in the list, but it’s always good to be reminded of Truth, don’t you think?
So think about something in your life that you’ve been wanting to change, and view that goal through the lens of truth below.
Lie #1: “I might fail. and failure is bad.” Our culture deifies success and scorns failure. It’s kind of ironic, since failure nearly always precedes success. Regardless of the illogic, fear of failure often hinders our ability- and sometimes our desire- to try.
So here’s the truth, kids: Yes, you might fail, but being afraid to fail is dumb. The world already knows you’re not perfect, and if it doesn’t it hasn’t been paying attention. So press down that fear of failure, and try. If you fail, it’s ok. You can just look for a way to improve and try again. The truth is, you don’t have to be perfect.
Lie #2: “If I try, there will be change and change is scary.” As they say, “Better the devil you know than the devil you don’t”. Change can be scary, because it is The Unknown. Even success can bring new experiences, challenges, and people into your world. It’s astonishing how quickly we get used to how things are now. But we often forget that we will get used to whatever change is coming, too.
It’s true that things could get worse. but if they do you can change again. And just think how great it will be when the change makes things better! The truth is, change really is good!
Lie #3: “If I try, I will look stupid. I don’t want to look stupid.” Ah, the fear of looking like a moron. It happens. We all look a little moronic at times, but that doesn’t mean we have to like it.
But here’s the thing: if you’re going to look dumb at some point, wouldn’t you rather have it happen because you’re trying to make your life better? Besides, people whose opinions you should care about won’t look at your failed attempt to change and say, “She/He’s stupid.” They’ll look at you and think, “Wow, she/he’s trying to get better. I respect that.” The truth is, change is worth feeling stupid for a short time.
Lie #4: “Others will lose respect for me because they see my weaknesses.” We avoid some changes because we feel like the very act of trying to improve shines a spotlight on our weaknesses. If I diet, everyone will know that I’m overweight. If I start an exercise routine, everyone will know that I haven’t workout out in months. If I start a new budgeting system, everyone will know that I haven’t been managing my money well. Well, I hate to be the one to tell you, but people MIGHT already know that you have flaws. I mean, it’s possible. Since, you know, we all have flaws.
So stomp on that ridiculous pride, and reach up to your goals.
You can’t improve without acknowledging your weaknesses, but the reality is that few people expect perfection out of you other than yourself. And besides that, no one pays as much attention to you as you do. They’re not really watching you, because they’re too busy worrying about themselves. Forget them; this is about you! The truth is, we all have weaknesses; people will respect you for trying to improve yourself.
What other lies about making a good change can you identify in your own life? Tracking them down will empower you to reject those lies and move forward in your life. Good luck with your upcoming changes!
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